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Wife divorces husband over broken penis extension

The number of times we’ve heard a story like this... is precisely none. Poor old Grigory Toporov is facing a lifetime of singledom after his wife is filing for divorce due to an extension he got done proved to be a bit shonky. The trouble is, it wasn’t the conservatory that went a bit awry – no, the 47-year-old got doctors to put a bit of extra length on his penis. He got the prosthetic extra bit because he felt he wasn’t measuring up to his wife’s expectations between the sheets.

All seemed fine until a recent bout of rowdy shagging, when the fake bit of cock-length snapped off halfway through – a case of pain stopped play it seems. Toporov’s wife hasn’t been particularly sensitive about this, the latest in a string of bedroom failures from her beau and it appears to have been the straw that broke the camel’s back - or the session that broke the.. well you know.

The furious soon-to-be-not Mrs Toporov hasn’t even been placated by a generous offer from Grigory. "I told her I would get a new one but she wasn't having any of it. She said she was fed up with my failures in bed and wants a divorce." He said, probably quite miserably. See gents – a biggun doesn’t always do you any favours at all.

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