Another day, another penis biting story. A polish man was rushed to hospital last week after his (former) best friend bit off and swallowed his manhood following a row.
The injured party, 53-year-old Marian Milczarek, and his trouser snake munching friend Wojciech Sowinski apparently fell out over a borrowed car trailer.
"He began hitting me with a chain and then pulled down my trousers and started biting. It was agony," Milczarek told police.
Paramedics searched in vain for the poor unfortunate's yoghurt gun of love, but were unable to locate it leading them to believe that Sowinski scoffed it. Cross legs now.