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Blame it on the Tabasco

One moment of madness can apparently lead to another. In the dying embers of December, Rafael Escamilla, a 50-year-old Florida resident, was onboard a flight to Idaho when he decided to get his member out and give it a going over. The 17-year-old girl sitting next to him informed the flight attendants, who notified police on the ground.

But when confronted by police, Rafael explained it had been a big mistake – he wasn’t at all tommy-tanking infront of a minor, he’d just spilt Tabasco sauce all over himself, causing his nether regions to burn.

Though some credit should possibly be given for the attempt at quick thinking, it’s such a crazy excuse that we can only assume he was trying to draw attention away from the general perviness of his actions. Without a bottle of the stuff in sight, and no Tabasco sauce stains to back up the claims, what else could the police do but condemn this condimental character?

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