BellaDonna : 'priests should learn art of sex'

Something we never thought we'd live the day to see has just happened. An American porn star wants to give tips to priests on how to have sex.

27 year old porno veteran 'BellaDonna' is in Australia to promote her rather illustrious riding career and take part in the Sydney Sexbo festival. Whilst there, BellaDonna has also thrown her tuppence worth in on a debate about whether the Catholic Church should apologise to victims of sexual abuse. BellaDonna thinks it's right the Church address the issue, but at the same time should address the even more pressing issue that priests know next to nothing about real sex.

'How can they know if they've never had a go' is BellaDonna's attitude, and whose X rated film credits include such titles as Cockhappy 1 2 & 3, Manhandled and Butthole Whores. "Church clergy are at a crisis because they get no real street-level sex education but are expected to ply the streets to deliver their spiritual message."

Bella also thinks the Pope should lead the charge in offering 'practical advice that addresses the sexual needs and desires of clergy'. Why not give priests a set of 'meaningful' tension releasing exercises which not only will diffuse some of that longing, but also teach them a trick or two about life between the sheets? How else can priests be expected to navigate through the tangled alleys of 'fetish' and 'fantasy' without ever having done a crash course in which is which?

Hmmm. Good point BellaDonna. No more Midnight Mass for us until Father O Riley learns to pump ping pong balls out of his....Amen!

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